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tooty123

TT&M Family
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About tooty123

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    TT&M Family
  1. i'm actually really happy that my post has allowed people to come together and share their "dark knight of the soul" i didn't expect it so that's a nice pleasant surprise thank you all :heartz: i'm lost for words as i agree with a lot of the posts here, i really admire all the ways in which you guys handle your anger/pain. i usually go into hermit mode i don't like to be around people when i'm going through the motions lol and evil thoughts meaning .... (punching someone, wishing an accident etc) i'm not proud of those thoughts, i hate them. i'v just had a lot of unjust things done to me and i guess i'm worried it will turn me bitter, i'm fighting it everyday. Like to make it clear there is a huge difference between doing it and thinking it. i'v had a lot of disappointments (betrayal/backstabbing) that have fuelled my anger and slowly through spirituality i'm finding a middle ground. i'm doing some soul searching rn. thanks for all the replies, it has helped :heartz:
  2. this is exactly what i'm aware of and yet it's difficult to put into 3D, I think meditation might be the thing i need to bring back focus. hate being angry or moody it takes away from the beauty of now. :( Since being awaken i have noticed a lot of toxicity within my group of friends. I hate that i do because i care about them and i'v known them for years so it's hard to fully detatch, they also try to put me down in passive-aggressive ways and i guess it's just built up from disappointment. in people mainly through my own expectations, though i try very hard not to let all that turn me bitter. thank you all so much for sharing it's honestly lovely to know i'm not alone in this. After i studied the hell out of narcissist/psychopath vids on youtube i felt miserable, lost and didn't want to go on after dating one myself. i was looking for a video on how to be more content and happy and i came across Jason J Gallant on youtube and he just completely changed my life. i feel hope again and more than ever to discover who i truly am. sick of being told how to live my life when i never want to dictate how someone should live. i just encourage people do the right thing, unless i feel super intimidated. some people just don't want others to be happy i'v learned. did spirituality help any of you come through hard times in your life too? share only what you want people to know. you don't have to tell the whole story if it makes you uncomfortable. i know mine does. ((
  3. i didn't think of that :blove: Might actually try that thank you for sharing. there are so many different ways to do tarot spread, bit of an amateur so wouldn't know where to start haha, what would you recommend please? ^-^ i completely agree. :( going to have to face the music sometime. i didn't like weed until i dated a covert narc. he was addicted and got me into it. these days i use it to calm myself from all the pain. without it i'm grumpy. it's pathetic of me really but sometimes it hits the spot when nothing else can at the time.
  4. i agree there, anger can be more destructive to ourselves than others more often than not. i have been crapped on by people who claim to be angels but are really the devil. after getting myself accidentally involved with a covert narcissist i have this extreme anger towards any kind of bully. Makes me want to become some kind of vigilante lol similar to Dexter just less gruesome. though i'd much rather be loving and supporting people than feeding them their own medicine, some days the anger wins :( Journaling might be a good idea. might be a better alternative than smoking the herb. nothing gets me calmer than the herb. I appreciate your reply, thank you for sharing. :heartz: ((
  5. tooty123

    Hi!

    helloooo there :heartz: maybe you can make your own tarot deck one day. arts a brilliant skill to have, not forgetting being a conduit for higher forces - pretty good combo if you ask me. ^-^
  6. is it still possible to be spiritual and have evil thoughts? :think: i don't want to be thinking like that but some people make me want to be a medieval torturer. I try handle things in a calmer manner but my blood ends up boiling like a cauldron lol Interested to see if you guys have felt similar, if you have overcome it or still going through it. I believe in spirituality yet sometimes my thoughts don't feel very spiritual lol please feel free to share your stories/experiences and advice if any. thanks :heartz:
  7. the passenger, walking dead, sideswiped, vikings, Camelot :heartz:
  8. I don't know if I would have been able to be a school bus driver if I had that fear! lolol :blol: happens a lot huh? :eek:
  9. Emetophobia aka fear of vomit :bsweat:
  10. unfortunately a guy lol :rolleyes: :))
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