What kind of questions do you avoid?

[gregory]

Ahh..If I'd seen a guy cheating and a woman asked about it then I'd 100% off him to her. lol The only reason I wouldn't create that kind of mess with cards even though my accuracy is good; I've had a lifetime of years with my eyes and ears..only a few years with tarot so won't create huge waves with it unless I feel absolutely certain, but I would ask the person if there is another close female around him or ask if he is interested in another woman to sort of hint at keeping an eye and a ear out (if i'm CERTAIN). What do you feel about empaths or telepathy (if you don't believe-then just imagine)? Would that be an intrusion in your eyes as well since you do not ask first before unconciously taking in their feelings or thoughts? Just curious? Thanks :)

If it hit me when I hadn't asked - I would not regard it as intrusive (like the two health issues I picked up, it would have been unsolicited) but I wouldn't come right out and tell my sitter or whoever.

 

This kind of reminds me of a situation where I and my partner were on the outs, and my father had Strong Views about it all, and kept banging on about "the onlooker sees more of  the game" to which I would respond with "but that helps no-one if the onlooker doesn't know the rules." We don't know how other people's lives work, so what we see as something that needs SORTING may to them be something else entirely; we also only have the sitter's view of things if they have asked the question.

 

Minefield; I don't walk minefields.

[Trogon]

Ahh..If I'd seen a guy cheating and a woman asked about it then I'd 100% off him to her. lol The only reason I wouldn't create that kind of mess with cards even though my accuracy is good; I've had a lifetime of years with my eyes and ears..only a few years with tarot so won't create huge waves with it unless I feel absolutely certain, but I would ask the person if there is another close female around him or ask if he is interested in another woman to sort of hint at keeping an eye and a ear out (if i'm CERTAIN). What do you feel about empaths or telepathy (if you don't believe-then just imagine)? Would that be an intrusion in your eyes as well since you do not ask first before unconciously taking in their feelings or thoughts? Just curious? Thanks :)

If it hit me when I hadn't asked - I would not regard it as intrusive (like the two health issues I picked up, it would have been unsolicited) but I wouldn't come right out and tell my sitter or whoever.

 

This kind of reminds me of a situation where I and my partner were on the outs, and my father had Strong Views about it all, and kept banging on about "the onlooker sees more of  the game" to which I would respond with "but that helps no-one if the onlooker doesn't know the rules." We don't know how other people's lives work, so what we see as something that needs SORTING may to them be something else entirely; we also only have the sitter's view of things if they have asked the question.

 

Minefield; I don't walk minefields.

 

Well, this is a good point Gregory. If some of these things come up in the course of a regular reading, I do tell the querent what I see in said reading. For example, if I were doing a relationship reading and it appeared the person's significant other were cheating on them, I would have to tell them what I saw in the reading. Fortunately, this has not come up yet ...

 

And yeah ... minefields ...

[chongjasmine]

 

If somebody (not the cards, but a person) told me about a child sex ring or a murder, confidentiality goes out the window. I've never violated confidentiality, but in a case like that, I'd be morally obligated.

 

I agree. If someone commits a serious crime, I will not be confidential about it.

[Ace]

I won't read for EX-boyfriends--it is none of their business.

 

I DO read health--with the warning that I am NOT a doctor and not diagnosing.

 

I will not read for "soul mates" or as they call it now, "twin flames" (GAG!)

I don't believe in soul mates--over the last 28 yrs I have met 35 people who met mr/ms soul mate and it didn't work out.

 

If they ask if their significant other is cheating--I will say so. The usual answer is NO. Usually they believe it to be true already.

 

I believe the future is THEIRS to create, so I won't do timing EVER.

 

barb

 

 

[katrinka]

Soul mates - ack.

Keen used to run an ad: "IS HE YOUR SOUL MATE? CALL NOW!" and I'd get endless soul mate calls.

>:( >:( >:(

Another one is "The One". "Is he THE ONE?"

Yes and yes, for now. Maybe in a few weeks it will be someone else.  ;D

 

[gregory]

IS soul mate the same as twin flame ? I thought there was a difference and that twin flames were Somehow More Important , more SPESHUL, and stuff...

[isawhale]

IS soul mate the same as twin flame ? I thought there was a difference and that twin flames were Somehow More Important , more SPESHUL, and stuff...

 

There's only 1 twin flame in a lifetime (some people don't at all) and most people have multiple soul mates in their lifetime here to meet and progress our spirit's growth. I've met many soul mates in my life that touched my soul and healed me and pushed me forward towards expansion (this dosn't just pertain to romantic relationships btw!) A soul mate can be your best friend, your grandma, your dog! LOL So it's definitely not the same time. Twin flame applies mostly to the push pull relationship dynamic, energy sharing, and soul growth you attain within the relationship...It is not an easy relationship in the least and twin flames do not stay together, they will have a push pull dynamic and have distance (some reason they cannot be together) until they reach enlightenment (divine masculine/divine feminine) and can merge...That's the theory anyway; and there's a whole list of requirements according to google...

[EmpyreanKnight]

Well if I'm going to have one anyway, I hope my soulmate/twin flame/THE ONE will be a rich un, titles optional.

[gregory]

OK. I knew I didn't buy in and now I know that even more :)

 

But if I have a twin flame, I am already married to it :)

[Onaorkal]

IS soul mate the same as twin flame ? I thought there was a difference and that twin flames were Somehow More Important , more SPESHUL, and stuff...

 

There's only 1 twin flame in a lifetime (some people don't at all) and most people have multiple soul mates in their lifetime here to meet and progress our spirit's growth. I've met many soul mates in my life that touched my soul and healed me and pushed me forward towards expansion (this dosn't just pertain to romantic relationships btw!) A soul mate can be your best friend, your grandma, your dog! LOL So it's definitely not the same time. Twin flame applies mostly to the push pull relationship dynamic, energy sharing, and soul growth you attain within the relationship...It is not an easy relationship in the least and twin flames do not stay together, they will have a push pull dynamic and have distance (some reason they cannot be together) until they reach enlightenment (divine masculine/divine feminine) and can merge...That's the theory anyway; and there's a whole list of requirements according to google...

 

Thanks for the info isawhale! I think the concept of soulmates and twin flames is interesting, but like with everything, some people get really obsessed over that and it can get quite scary! I don't think I would do that kind of reading either, I mean if someone is asking ''Is my boyfriend my soulmate?'' and you say NO and she wants to break up I would be like ''ehhhhh''  ::)

 

In the end, those are only 'words' anyway, words to describe relationships, feelings and exchanges of energy.  ;)

[katrinka]

Arrgh.

 

The definition changes with the fashions. I first learned that a "soulmate" was "the other half of your divine soul", whatever that is. The ray/conciousness/whatever splits into male-female duality and is incarnated. Which sounds plausible until you consider that a lot of people are gay.

 

Then it became "your soulmate can be a lot of people from the same energy cluster (or what have you). But that didn't leave room for the Big Love, so they came up with Twin Flames. Only Twin Flames vibrate on such a high rate that it doesn't often work out in this world. Or WTF ever.

 

It's,99% crap. IMHO. I feel like there's something behind it, but we're not getting it. We can't.

[gregory]

There is indeed something behind it. The need to feel SPECIAL. Different. More significant than the people who DON'T use these terms. ;)

 

Me I'm fine with the love of my life. We totally fit, and I am confident that if either of these terms means anything at all, I have found mine.

[isawhale]

There is indeed something behind it. The need to feel SPECIAL. Different. More significant than the people who DON'T use these terms. ;)

 

Me I'm fine with the love of my life. We totally fit, and I am confident that if either of these terms means anything at all, I have found mine.

 

right...some things need to be experienced to be believed..

[Trogon]

Arrgh.

 

The definition changes with the fashions. I first learned that a "soulmate" was "the other half of your divine soul", whatever that is. The ray/conciousness/whatever splits into male-female duality and is incarnated. Which sounds plausible until you consider that a lot of people are gay.

 

Then it became "your soulmate can be a lot of people from the same energy cluster (or what have you). But that didn't leave room for the Big Love, so they came up with Twin Flames. Only Twin Flames vibrate on such a high rate that it doesn't often work out in this world. Or WTF ever.

 

It's,99% crap. IMHO. I feel like there's something behind it, but we're not getting it. We can't.

 

I agree. At least the part about there being something that we can't get in all of this. We are humans who are trying to understand things that might be taking place with our infinite souls outside of our corporeal, finite lives on earth. We are trying to apply mortal terms to immortal ideas of love and connection. So, we make a guess, we say that "oh, there are times that two souls connect before the incarnate in human form" and someone coins the term "soul-mate" to describe this. Then they discover that, at times, our "soul-mates" may not be compatible in this incarnation, so we come up with other terms for the ones we have the most passion for ... or whatever. To a large extent, what Gregory said fits people's desire for these concepts;

 

There is indeed something behind it. The need to feel SPECIAL. Different. More significant than the people who DON'T use these terms. ;)

 

Me I'm fine with the love of my life. We totally fit, and I am confident that if either of these terms means anything at all, I have found mine.

 

Most of us want to feel special. By claiming someone is a "soul-mate", "twin flame", "super-supreme pizza" or whatever, allows us to gain that special feeling. However, there is another aspect that arises in the area of helping us to feel special, is that someone figures they can make money from coining that new phrase and writing a book that explains how this old idea is passé buy my new ideas are the cat's pajamas! Unfortunately, this tends to really muddy the water so that the average person may really lose sight of what is true and leave them grasping at straws.

 

And, yes, I am rather cynical about people in general. Well, about certain aspects of humanity anyway. But, finding someone and falling in love really isn't the hard part, is it? That is the staying together and growing together as you travel through life. I think that many people just don't want to give up such a large part of themselves.

 

Have I found my "soul-mate" or whatever? I don't know. I found someone who seems to truly love me and has continued to put up with me for 40 years, so I guess we did alright.

 

But, getting back to the original question and how it relates to all this; If someone comes to me and wants me to tell them if someone is their "soul-mate", I do have spreads on relationships and potential partners. But I would have to explain that all I can do is tell them what the cards tell me and that the terms "soul-mate" or "twin flame" are probably not going to come up in the reading. I do have a "looking for love" spread as well that was designed with the idea of pointing someone in the right direction. But anything like that is iffy, since it relies on the querent actually taking the advice offered.

[katrinka]

Most of us want to feel special. By claiming someone is a "soul-mate", "twin flame", "super-supreme pizza" or whatever, allows us to gain that special feeling. However, there is another aspect that arises in the area of helping us to feel special, is that someone figures they can make money from coining that new phrase and writing a book that explains how this old idea is passé buy my new ideas are the cat's pajamas! Unfortunately, this tends to really muddy the water so that the average person may really lose sight of what is true and leave them grasping at straws.

 

And, yes, I am rather cynical about people in general. Well, about certain aspects of humanity anyway. But, finding someone and falling in love really isn't the hard part, is it? That is the staying together and growing together as you travel through life. I think that many people just don't want to give up such a large part of themselves.

 

Have I found my "soul-mate" or whatever? I don't know. I found someone who seems to truly love me and has continued to put up with me for 40 years, so I guess we did alright.

 

This. People call me with this idea that because they were strongly attracted to someone initially, that's The One, the soulmate, and they recognized them. Like in "Elfquest".  ;D

 

No. That means their hormones and brain chemicals are in good working order. As Bette Davis said, "Sex is God's joke on human beings." They wake up one morning and wonder WTH they are doing with that person, they have nothing in common. And it's off on another soulmate quest they go.

 

We have to wait and see. Not even the almighty Tarot can see 40 years into the future. (But it helps to get to know a person for awhile before jumping into something you might have a hard time getting out of.)

 

[sandrang123]

Thankfully, the powers that be seem happy to give us many people in our life to both "challenge" or "help" us, depending upon our perception, but all for our spiritual growth. So the notion of "soul mates" has always seemed a bit odd to me, given that any person put before you is there to help you learn something (to my mind, anyway).

 

This idea of "twin flames" or whatever they are called. I met someone--literally double my age, and at my age, that's almost DEAD--who mirrored me almost exactly, and with whom I felt a very strong connection that would never be destined to manifest as anything other than heartache. To top it off, after our very, VERY first conversation, I had a past life dream with this person in it, and that "dream" guided me to know how it would turn out in this life...which is to say, not well, nor had it EVER turned out well. This was a person I truly loved, for guidance and kinship. This relationship seemed grand at first, but it did, indeed, end abruptly, with no rhyme or reason as to why.

 

I am not someone who thinks myself "special" in terms of things. And I agree...these "new" new-agey terms really grind on me, but sometimes the "new" energies coming forward to the planet have things to offer, too--even language. So while I'm never comfortable with these terms, I do allow myself a little time to ponder if there is something to them.

[chongjasmine]

I still avoid questions of a religious nature, though not of health anymore.

[Grizabella]

I haven't read all the posts in this thread because it's so long and I wanted to add something.

 

If you're looking for a soul mate or twin flame, it would be more productive, in my opinion, if the sitter would concentrate more on being someone's soulmate or twin flame than putting the burden on the other person or spending precious spiritual energy look for someone else to fill the void.

 

But on topic---I haven't got a lot of "won't do" rules in my Tarot practice. I won't read on someone else's gender orientation or whether they're gay or not. Also, I seldom  read on "is my spouse cheating?" questions. I prefer to just modify the question into more healthy waters.

 

Tarot is one of the ancient methods of seeking information from the Universe/God/Higher Power. Using divination was the only avenue for some to get answers from the deity to all their questions that needed addressing, so that's what I remember and try to stay true to. This means that putting a ton of stuff on my  "I won't" list is something I just don't do. Not reading on the gay issue and spousal cheating is just about all I don't read on, although I do rephrase questions and direct attention differently in some cases.

[DevonCarter]

I haven't read enough for other people to have any rules about what I will or won't read, but I can say that every time I click on a thread asking advice about a reading, if it is about love/romance/relationships (and it very frequently is, especially among new posters) I roll my eyes and click the back button. Especially if it's of the "Will he..." or "what does he think of me" variety. I'm not really sure why those questions squick me so much, but they do. Sometimes they feel very much like an 8th grade slumber party Magic 8 Ball type question, but even when they are more meaningful questions they feel strange to me.

 

My gut reaction every time is "Ugh, love yourself first, and don't put so much stock in what other people think of you - you're complete unto yourself!"

 

I did do a "romance" reading for my sister when she asked (she's married, so it was about an established relationship), and I don't know that I'd refuse to do a reading like that if someone asked, but online I NOPE right out every time!

[Grandma]

...I roll my eyes and click the back button. Especially if it's of the "Will he..." or "what does he think of me" variety. I'm not really sure why those questions squick me so much, but they do. Sometimes they feel very much like an 8th grade slumber party Magic 8 Ball type question, but even when they are more meaningful questions they feel strange to me.

Hee heee  I agree DevonCarter[/member] ! I've posted this picture in several places today but it just seems to fit again here:

 

The answers are all within.

 

[EmpressAdora]

I really haven’t read for enough people to have that kind of problem. I think I feel the same as most have stated about medical issues and things of the like. I am still at a point where it’s not always easy for me to give bad news. I had a friend request a reading because she felt that her mother in law was trying to break up her marriage. She was asking for advice and so on about how she could make the situation better. It wasn’t pretty. That was kind of hard to put a positive spin on it so she didn’t feel beat up. But I guess that goes with the territory.

[Wanderer]

Tricky...

Aside from questions where I think it is immoral (trying to pry into the private life of a third party, for example), I'm starting to learn what sort of questions I enjoy reading for, and which make me uneasy.  Future readings have sometimes been problematic, where the sitter has clear ideas of what they want to happen, and that isn't necessarily what will happen. I'm getting a lot more confident that (somehow) the cards can handle such questions accurately... but I'm becoming more reluctant to read them, because of how unexpected predictions are sometimes received by the sitter. Where possible, I'd rather alter the phrasing to make it more about the sitter than about future events.

 

Otherwise, I'm not sure what I'd avoid. I've not been asked to read on medical subjects, but I don't think I'd be at all happy there. And soul mate questions..? Well, I guess it would depend on the question! ::)

 

[Grandma]

I've always avoided third party questions like the plague.  I can't tell what that guy you met last weekend is thinking about you and it's none of my business even if I could.  And I don't do yes-or-no questions because there are at least four answers - yes, no, maybe and how the heck should I know.  And although I have never until recently been asked to read for an animal, I would have declined.

 

But last night I did a third party reading on whether two cats had found true love.  Take a look at this fun thread by Eva4[/member] !

 

https://www.thetarotforum.com/your-readings-75/cats-in-love/msg63371/#msg63371

[Iekthecat]

Anything negative or health/death. I think some things are not in our place to tell/ask about. And with negative I mean purposely wanting to do harm or bring someone misery, like ‘is he going to leave his wife for me’ etc

 

I don’t usually, but sometimes I ‘pry’, wanting to know where his focus is or if he feels there are problems, which I do feel like gives me an advantage over my partner, but I only use it to make us stronger and to understand better, so I see it as something positive because my intention are too.

[GreatDane]

Health of querent or someone querent is asking about and questions that are invading someone else's privacy (is my BOSS having an affair?). 

 

Serial sitters that will ask multiple readers the same question...over and over and over especially within the same day.