Couples or individual

[sahaja]

My partner and I wanted to explore our relationship through  the cards. Could we do a joint reading or would it only work if we did separate reading for each of us?

[gregory]

I wouldn't try and have the two of you - or even one of you - try it; it could be skewed from one side. I think it probably could be done - but by a third party.

[DanielJUK]

Hi @sahaja, welcome to the community 😃

I've moved your thread over to the right area to discuss it. Also you might like to introduce yourself to us in the introductions area sometime 

[Aoife]

I agree with Gregory that its not a good idea for you and/or your partner to do the reading because of inevitable bias.

That said, Umbrae's Relationship Spread, as detailed below is excellent. I'd just find a competent, independent reader.

 

Umbrae's Relationship Spread

Relationship spreads are very difficult, because You are dealing with two people, their lives, thoughts, and emotions simultaneously.

 

You are also looking at the very alive, shifting, and quixotic reality created by the afore mentioned attributes of two people, the third entity we call, the relationship.

 

You lay it out in three columns. The columns are read both downwards, and from both sides inward. It is set up so that the left column shows Person 1’s path through the relationship; the right column shows that of Person 2. The center column is read both as a separate (third) entity, AND dependant upon the paths of person 1 & 2.

 

Left column

Person 1 Feels this is the emotional baggage.

Person 1 Needs intellectualized emotion

Person 1 Expected Outcome

 

Right Column

Person 2 Feels this is the emotional baggage.

Person 2 Needs intellectualized emotion

Person 2 Expected Outcome

 

Center Column

Core (what the relationship is founded on)

Needs (what the relationship needs)

What we can expect of the relationship (expectations)

The future of the relationship. (Probable reality)

 

This relationship spread is tricky, and appears slightly difficult.

It is not a, “A=1, B=2, C=3” type spread.

 

Row A is ‘stuff we drag around with us’. Emotional baggage we use as a ‘root’, or foundation – this is also past. This is Ego’s Regret. Picture it as a large steamer trunk that we drag around…Marleys Ghost’s Chains…

 

Row B can be read as Hopes or Fears, Ego’s Anxiety about the unknown future. It could also be what we really need, on a very deep level that we don’t want to admit. This is our 'Now'.

 

So looking at the two outside columns separately, they tend to indicate Feel – Need – Result. However they also simultaneously represent P-P-F; AND baggage brought into the relationship, (They are read downward); simultaneously, but not really. You have to look at the cards and allow them to read themselves to you, let them tell you, “Hey! This is a need issue”, or “Hey, I’m a Fear”. Hopes and needs are similar.

 

After reading the two outside columns downwards, comes the big task. Reading from the outside towards the center.

 

A center card should not be read ‘by itself’; it is best read as to how it has been 'created' by the two cards on either side. Or perhpas even...How it creates the cards on either side.

 

This spread is not so much about 'card meanings' as 'flow', and how the cards interact with each other.

 

For example, the second row is entirely dependant on the cards above it. The second row is a result...and the third is a result...all the way down...

 

That's step two - the center is dependant on the outside cards, and lower cards are results of higher cards...

 

Step three (and the most difficult and strange)...

 

Look at the whole unit as a 'flow', not as 10 cards, but as 1 piece of art. look for how the power or love or passion play out as you move down (remember - you're not looking at 10 cards).

 

Here's a thought. Go to a gallery or a Museum first. Look at art.

 

Look at some Monet's. NOT online. Real live stuff. Dale Chihuly glasswork will do too.

 

Look at all kinds of art. Immerse yourself in art.

 

You don’t think about what Monet or Chihuly or Renoir or Granville or Dali or Escher or Roger Dean or Gauguin…or what they did or were 'trying to say'...or how they did it...

 

How does it make you feel?

 

Remember finger painting as a child in school? The feel of the paint between your fingers? The feel when you looked at the result?

 

That’s the flow you want to look at when looking at this spread. I often suggest laying it out so you can ‘get some distance’, where a 7 of Swords loses its details, and becomes a blur of color.

 

Is there a card that the whole of the spread seems to 'revolve' around? Does one card work as a 'hinge'? Is there a balance all the way down? Does a harmonious whole become two distinct and separate entities with that last card making a singular statement?

 

Forget meanings - think art - think how does it make you feel...

 

Do not use reversals…

 

This spread was designed for use with the WCS, how the colors ‘flow’ will vary based on decks. Monochromatic decks should NOT be used.

 

(When I was wearing glasses, I'd take my glasses off so the whole spread would blurr - then I'd read the blur. You may try looking through plastic wrap...)

 

It is well worth investing the time to learn it. I have used this spread for years...with excellent results.

 

[chongjasmine]

I think the reading done by you and/or your partner will be bias. It will be better if a third party reads for you, who does not know you or your partner personally.

Emotion is a weird thing, that colors our perspective.