Opinions on cutting the cord between you and your soulmate

[Bluangel27]

On 4/22/2023 at 10:06 AM, FindYourSovereignty said:

At first I was a little nervous about it - felt odd to disconnect myself from my children and grandchildren for example, yet, the return is tremendous. I have come to really value the practice. Helps me to recognize that we are all truly here for our own journey no matter how entwined or connected our lives are. 

 

@FindYourSovereignty Why would you feel disconnected from your children and grandchildren? 

[Bluangel27]

Also, what do everyone think about cutting the cord between twin flames?  

[Grandma]

I don't subscribe to the twin flames concept. Just as well. I can't even cut cords with people I have no business being with in the first place. Joke? Maybe. 

 

But seriously. Let's assume there are twin flames. I could be wrong. How do you define a twin flame, or a soul mate, @Bluangel27? Am I correct that you are using the terms interchangeably? What exactly does that mean to you? Why would the cord need to be cut? Perhaps if I understand your question better I might have some ideas about it.

[Bluangel27]

1 hour ago, Grandma said:

I don't subscribe to the twin flames concept. Just as well. I can't even cut cords with people I have no business being with in the first place. Joke? Maybe. 

 

But seriously. Let's assume there are twin flames. I could be wrong. How do you define a twin flame, or a soul mate, @Bluangel27? Am I correct that you are using the terms interchangeably? What exactly does that mean to you? Why would the cord need to be cut? Perhaps if I understand your question better I might have some ideas about it.

Soulmates are people apart of your soul family, y'all been together throughout lifetimes, you share a spiritual connection. They can be your family members, friends, romantic partners.

Twin flames share the same soul essence as you, you only have one. You have many soulmates. You don't have to be with them romantically, you can just be friends with your twin flame. The spiritual component to both hard not to acknowledge.  If you are spiritually in-tuned to see it, dream it, hear it, you have to recognize it. 

 

The two aren't the same thing, they just stick out more than a person you don't have a soul connection with. 

[Bluangel27]

1 hour ago, Grandma said:

I don't subscribe to the twin flames concept. Just as well. I can't even cut cords with people I have no business being with in the first place. Joke? Maybe. 

 

But seriously. Let's assume there are twin flames. I could be wrong. How do you define a twin flame, or a soul mate, @Bluangel27? Am I correct that you are using the terms interchangeably? What exactly does that mean to you? Why would the cord need to be cut? Perhaps if I understand your question better I might have some ideas about it.

 

You would want to cut the cord between your soulmate just to get a spiritual break and reset the relationship. Twin Flames, from what I read, it's ill-advise to cut the connection between them because it can backfire on you since they share the same soul essence you are made of. 

[gregory]

On 4/24/2023 at 6:47 AM, Bluangel27 said:

Soulmates are people apart of your soul family, y'all been together throughout lifetimes, you share a spiritual connection. They can be your family members, friends, romantic partners.

Twin flames share the same soul essence as you, you only have one. You have many soulmates. You don't have to be with them romantically, you can just be friends with your twin flame. The spiritual component to both hard not to acknowledge.  If you are spiritually in-tuned to see it, dream it, hear it, you have to recognize it. 

 

The two aren't the same thing, they just stick out more than a person you don't have a soul connection with. 

 

On 4/24/2023 at 6:55 AM, Bluangel27 said:

 

You would want to cut the cord between your soulmate just to get a spiritual break and reset the relationship. Twin Flames, from what I read, it's ill-advise to cut the connection between them because it can backfire on you since they share the same soul essence you are made of. 

All this kind of thing is exactly why I don't subscribe to any of the twin flame/soulmates stuff. My view is that it's all mumbo jumbo. You meet people in life that you connect with on many levels. Some connections are healthy and work out fine. Others, work for a while and then go bad - however much you may love/feel connected to that person. I even have a total soulmate I have had to cut off - at one time I think she may have fit the description of a twin flame; we were that close. Almost like one person. But it has become totally toxic, and however much of a twin she may be, it is damaging for me to have anything to do with her. If I subscribed to twin flame theory, I'd probably be in a terrible way right now with worry about the damage to my essence and all that - on the contrary; I am starting to feel free of her - after some 45 years of closeness.

 

Relationships are just that - relationships. No more, no less.

Edited June 13, 2024 by gregory

[FindYourSovereignty]

11 hours ago, Bluangel27 said:

 

@FindYourSovereignty Why would you feel disconnected from your children and grandchildren? 

I wouldn’t and I don’t. However, I do annually cut all cords so that I am not so attached to them that I smother myself or them. They don’t deserve that and neither do I. 
 

Edit: Maybe I could say they don’t need that and neither do I.
 

Works for me either way. 
 

 

Edited April 24, 2023 by FindYourSovereignty

[Misterei]

7 hours ago, gregory said:

All this kind of thing is exactly why I don't subscribe to any of the twin flame/soulmates stuff. My view is that it's all mumbo jumbo. You meet people in life that you connect with on many levels. Some connections are healthy and work out find. Others, work for a while and then go bad - however much you may love/feel connected to that person. I even have a total soulmate I have had to cut off - at one time I think she may have fit the description of a twin flame; we were that close. Almost like one person. But it has become totally toxic, and however much of a twin she may be, it is damaging for me to have anything to do with her. If I subscribed to twin flame theory, I'd probably be in a terrible way right now with worry about the damage to my essence and all that - on the contrary; I am starting to feel free of her - after some 45 years of closeness.

 

Relationships are just that - relationships. No more, no less.

@gregory OMG I am going through a similar experience with a 44 year (non romantic) friendship. What you just wrote describes my own experience perfectly. And it's hard at my age.  I used to think: this is a person we will see each other through until we die. But no. It's not going to be like that. It's heartbreaking ... and liberating. I've been listening to Eagles Already Gone. Even though the song is about a romantic relationship and this one wasn't ... I do feel FREE. Heartbroken, angry, but FREE.

 

There is no need to "cut a cord". It was more a matter of refusing to continue certain ways of thinking and behaving. CHANGING how I think and act ... and accepting that this person ISN'T going to change ... not matter how much I argue. apologize, give-in, fight back ... NONE of this will make her change ... and I finally accepted that ... and stopped doing it. We had a karma to complete. I learned my lesson ... God willing she's learned hers ... It's complete. I'm getting to a place of peace and acceptance.

Edited April 24, 2023 by Misterei

[gregory]

Exactly. I wrote to her a couple of months ago (after I heard she was telling my partner, who does see her occasionally, that she wished I remembered the good times !! I DO - that's why it hurts !) telling her I really valued our past, and that I would rather remember that and not have to live with the level of hurt of our last couple of meetings and her last letter to me. She lives on the other side of the world, so I haven't been seeing her more than a couple of times a year since we moved back to the UK - but the amount of nasties that can happen over - for the catastrophic last straw - four days staying with her is - monstrous ! Totally non romantic, but so very strong and close, in its heyday.

 

But right now my essence is doing just fine - so much better now that I have made the conscious decision simply not to see her again. It;s a bit sad that I think she is dying now - but she has a loving family, so she will have to do without seeing me again.

[Misterei]

12 hours ago, gregory said:

... but the amount of nasties that can happen over - for the catastrophic last straw - four days staying with her is - monstrous ! Totally non romantic, but so very strong and close, in its heyday.

 

But right now my essence is doing just fine - so much better now that I have made the conscious decision simply not to see her again. It;s a bit sad that I think she is dying now - but she has a loving family, so she will have to do without seeing me again.

I am sorry you're going through this, yet strangely relieved to hear it's not just me. I have some idealized vision this doesn't happen to other people. Meanwhile, that's the hard part at this age. People die. It makes it all the more poignant becuase there isn't this limitless future of youth ahead. Just the finality of so, this is how it ends. It hurts. But yes, the pain of that finality is lighter compared to the terrible weight of monstrous painful communications. I always think of myself growing kinder, wiser, and more gentle as I grow old. But somehow this relationship got more meanspirited and aggressive. Life is strange.

[Chariot]

I've never called it 'twin flames.'  I've always referred to that person as a 'soul mate.' There will be many other relationships with people you instantly click with, get along with, share a life of friendship or marriage with.  But the 'one' is different—and it lasts a lifetime.  And from the outset, you know. You will not necessarily be together in person all your life—sometimes circumstances will separate you shortly after you've met.  Sometimes you can even see that separation coming at the moment you meet, so recognising your soul mate can be both amazingly comforting and sad at the same time.  But the thing is, when it happens, you know.  It's hard to explain, but you know.   And that connection will not alter.

 

You may well end up in other relationships that are very satisfying ...but you still know. And while it can make you sad sometimes, that you can't be together in person, it can also be comforting to know that nothing is going to ever truly separate you from your soul mate.   You don't outgrow each other, as you can with other close relationships or friends.  Jealousy doesn't enter the picture, because both of you 'know.'  There is no need to prove anything to them. 

I never resort to mumbo jumbo to try to explain the phenomenon. I have no idea why it happens.  But severing a cord with them just isn't possible.  You will always hold that place for them, and they will do the same for you.  The connection doesn't hold you back.  It frees you to get on with life, knowing you will always have a home.

Edited April 27, 2023 by Chariot

[gregory]

Sorry Chariot - but leaving aside the friend I have decided never to see again (and about whom I felt - I knew, -exactly that - we would never be separated - and in a way we still aren't) - there are three people in my life who fit that EXACTLY. We will NEVER be separated. I simply do not believe in a ONE.

[Chariot]

1 hour ago, gregory said:

Sorry Chariot - but leaving aside the friend I have decided never to see again (and about whom I felt - I knew, -exactly that - we would never be separated - and in a way we still aren't) - there are three people in my life who fit that EXACTLY. We will NEVER be separated. I simply do not believe in a ONE.

I would certainly never argue that just because it hasn't happened to me, it can't be true.  I'm glad you have had three.  I know I've only had one, and don't expect to have more.  But not everybody gets the same sort of experience.  There are also people who insist the entire concept doesn't exist at all ...probably because it hasn't happened to them.

As I said, I have no idea why this happens.  Or why it happened to me.  I only know it did.  And it was the last thing I expected .  

Edited April 27, 2023 by Chariot

[Misterei]

1 hour ago, Chariot said:

... I'm glad you have had three.  I know I've only had one, and don't expect to have more.  But not everybody gets the same sort of experience.  There are also people who insist the entire concept doesn't exist at all ...probably because it hasn't happened to them ...

I think this is why I like the word "soul friend". Soul mate and twin flame get burdened by all this baggage of romantic or obsessional profiteering. There are a few - very few - people with whom I shared a profound karmic connection and they changed my life. Two were romantic and three not. The two romantic connections were love at first sight. Yet only one of these people is in my life anymore. @Chariot still I could never cut the cord with them. I can allow the connection to go dormant ... but it is always there on the soul level. The idea of cutting it is impossible and would be a violence. What I *did* have to cut off ... was my own emotional involvement and attachments at the ego level.

Edited April 28, 2023 by Misterei

[Bluangel27]

On 4/24/2023 at 6:47 AM, gregory said:

 

All this kind of thing is exactly why I don't subscribe to any of the twin flame/soulmates stuff. My view is that it's all mumbo jumbo. You meet people in life that you connect with on many levels. Some connections are healthy and work out find. Others, work for a while and then go bad - however much you may love/feel connected to that person. I even have a total soulmate I have had to cut off - at one time I think she may have fit the description of a twin flame; we were that close. Almost like one person. But it has become totally toxic, and however much of a twin she may be, it is damaging for me to have anything to do with her. If I subscribed to twin flame theory, I'd probably be in a terrible way right now with worry about the damage to my essence and all that - on the contrary; I am starting to feel free of her - after some 45 years of closeness.

 

Relationships are just that - relationships. No more, no less.

 

 

I get your point, but if you didn't know what the soul mate or twin flame is, you would still feel the spiritual closeness for them. That's why they stand out.  It's just going to take extra work to break away from them than other people. Hence why I'm asking about cord cutting. 

[gregory]

12 hours ago, Bluangel27 said:

 

 

I get your point, but if you didn't know what the soul mate or twin flame is, you would still feel the spiritual closeness for them. That's why they stand out.  It's just going to take extra work to break away from them than other people. Hence why I'm asking about cord cutting. 

Oh believe me, I still feel where the thread was, the spiritual link was very strong and as I said - we could almost have been one person. I just refuse to look at it; I cut it, it hurt a lot - but not as much as what was happening.

[gregory]

14 hours ago, Misterei said:

I think this is why I like the word "soul friend".

 

An expression I now use (I was reading Anne of Green Gables...) is "kindred spirit."

 

14 hours ago, Misterei said:

There are a few - very few - people with whom I shared a profound karmic connection and they changed my life. Two were romantic and three not. The two romantic connections were love at first sight. Yet only one of these people is in my life anymore. @Chariot still I could never cut the cord with them. I can allow the connection to go dormant ... but it is always there on the soul level. The idea of cutting it is impossible and would be a violence. What I *did* have to cut off ... was my own emotional involvement and attachments at the ego level.

 

Exactly this. Even if a twin flame or whatever existed, which I don't happen to believe - even though if there IS such a thing I know I still have at least 3 (and OMG am I lucky in them and they will never leave my life, nor I theirs - though I say that in the knowledge of what I just did...) it can very easily become malignant.

[Chariot]

4 hours ago, gregory said:

 

An expression I now use (I was reading Anne of Green Gables...) is "kindred spirit."

 

Yes, I actually like 'kindred spirit' for somebody who shares my view of the world in many respects—a person I can talk with and feel comfortable and happy spending time with.  Not just friends, but special friends.  And my dad, whom I loved dearly.

I also have a few people I love to bits who just seem to 'go' with me, even though we aren't necessarily alike, and don't necessarily share the same interests or outlooks.  My husband and my sister are firmly in that category, and so is my best friend.  She has been my best friend since we were 18—we clicked the day we met, started hanging out immediately, roomed together at University, spent holidays and time off together even after she got married (I love her husband to bits and we are also good friends.) We're 74 now—live on different continents because of MY marriage—and we still speak on the phone several times a month, exchange emails a lot, and love our differences.  We have never shared a cross word in all those years.

But there only one person who is my soul mate.  It's a totally different kind of sensation from these others.  As I said ...when it happens, you know.   It's totally mutual, wordless, and intense.  Lots of other people know what you're likely to do, how you're likely to respond, how you think and feel—but your soul mate knows WHY you think and feel the way you do—at a very deep level.  They will come up with a solution before you even realise you have a problem.  They hand you what you need before you realise you need it.  They can—and do—touch the parts of your inner self that nobody else ever sees.  It can be incredibly scary to be so vulnerable, until you realise there is no reason to fear because they will never hurt you. You can't fool them, so don't bother trying.  And that deep trust and understanding doesn't change, no matter what paths our lives take, or what other people are in it.  

[pacificwaters]

I just chanced upon this thread and went through each of the posts.

 

There was a time when I believed in the concept of twin flame and soul mates. A part of me still likes to believe in this concept and am really happy for those that said that they have such mates/flames! However over the past few years, I have started wondering that whether such relationships do exist. Or that whether these are terms just coined by the media/or whoever coins them 🙂 Yes there are mates and close mates, but personally I have seen time and distance change everything.

 

I have also been seeing some posts on IG about cord cutting with such folks. It makes sense. But dont today’s teens do it as well and term it as “ghosting”. Wouldn’t that be the same as well??

[Deian]

On 4/19/2023 at 5:27 AM, Bluangel27 said:

Hey everyone, 

 

I think this a spirituality question.

 

What are your opinions of cutting cords with your soulmate? 

 

Hi !
In systems and traditions I follow we do view that Soulmates exists. Although not in the same way they are often viewed in somewhat mainstream sources. And they rarely exist in the same time. People call them "reincarnations", usually, but that is long to go into.
Cutting that forms of connection, well, as long as we do it properly(meaning we don't do it ourselves, but we call on something that knows what its doing, we usually call archangels for that) all should be good. People from other religions have them with other names, but as their points of view to it is different, can't suggest exact equivalent, one has to find it themselves. For Archangels we call Michael for that(that is making the actual cutting and can make the balancing movements after that). I haven't seen any problems. Can imagine some situations when it could be a problem, but its very rare, in most cases should be more then fine if done properly. Even beneficial and even more so if not done by yourself.

 

That being said... There are other meditations. They can fully get someone out of our life. Have used them 2 times, both cases didn't expect they would work, but the person just disappeared from my life and now, decades later, doesn't seem that will change. Have heard a little about them in the decades after, have met one of them once, but that was kinda all. That seemed impossible back then, yet did happen...

That, in my humble view, just shouldn't be done with anyone, no matter what happens. Only valid reason I view for doing it, now, is learning, to figure out to trust the process, instead of controlling it by getting things out and in. That can happen as we see why we needed the person in our life to begin with.

 

For soulmates, I would guess if one tries it and manages to do it(as it can't be done everywhere, only one place it works in and one can't control all that happens there, much) they will get in "bugged" state for some lifetimes until they understand fully what has happened, what choices they made and make the steps back to disband it. As usual, just done purely with intention, nothing else needed after understanding.

 By that I mean the second meditation. Just cutting the cords is harmless, in most cases, yet wiser to do it with some assistance from the other levels, so its more beneficial then it may be otherwise, doing it from personality may be rocky, sometimes.