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Inaccurate readings


RosieBlack
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RosieBlack
4 hours ago, katrinka said:

 

😕

Actually, they do. Our job is to understand the cards correctly. The answer is always there on the table.
 

 

That's what study and practice is for.

 

 

Ask about that, too!
 

 

It's fine to read for yourself. We all read for ourselves. The only "risk" is pushing the cards to say what you want, and you have to learn not to do that. A reader has to stay neutral.

 

 

Was the reader getting that from just the Emperor, or from the Emperor combined with nearby cards? Or a certain named position? Cards are not read as little islands unto themselves.
 

 

How do you know? The card is suggesting that he is. There are a lot of ways a person can be tricked or deceived. There are many people who knew - even lived with someone - for years and had no idea what they were up to. Some of these cases even involved serial killers or child molesters. I'm not saying it's THAT severe - but never ignore a timely warning.

 

 

It's called putting the cards in context. It has to be learned.
 

 

You can see it's a good card, so it's a yes. And it's a celebration, so it could be interpreted as "Yes, around the next celebration or holiday."
Of course if it's boxed in by nasty cards, that won't happen. But the 3 of Cups itself is positive. 

 

 

Yes. The more precise the question, the clearer the answer. "Will Joe call me today?" will get you something MUCH clearer than "Tell me about my day" or "What do I need to know today?"

 



 

 

Ok point taken, study and learn! 😄

 

Yeah I know there's that risk and honestly I do try to see it from all angles and not just what I want the answer to be. 

 

The reader said specifically in relation to the emperor that he wasn't focusing on his feelings and was instead focusing on financial stability. The other cards weren't great for that question, but it still seemed a confusing interpretation of that card in terms of what he's feeling. The card was the first one in the spread but in all honesty I don't know what the different positions signify. I don't give me cards meanings in their positions, I just lay them out and try to tell a full story. Is that wrong? She said the outcome of the spread was Strength, but then I never do that with my spreads unless I specifically ask what the outcome is, I just ask current feelings at this time. 

 

Ok with the 7 of swords I don't know for sure that's what it means, but I can only apply it in how I feel it fits to my situation. So for example if I'm not with this person but we both like each other but aren't even in regular contact, how can he be tricking me or deceiving me? Do you see what I mean? This is why the only way to apply this card seems to be that he's hiding his feelings ergo the silence. If he didn't like me at all or want anything to do with me the 7 of swords wouldn't seem to apply at all because someone can't deceive you if they're not even in your life anymore. 

 

Sure I understand about putting the cards into context, but, like with the emperor, it could be taken to mean he's not focusing on his feelings or it could mean he's trying not to let his emotions overwhelm him and use logic. So sometimes it's hard to know which interpretation is the right one. I certainly don't want to be holding out hope for someone who is more interested in money than me.

 

I thought that as well about the 3 of cups card but then I asked about it in expectation for communication that day and alongside it was the page of swords and I heard nothing. The next day it was 3 of cups and the star - also both positive cards. Some websites even suggest the star means someone from your past may come back to rekindle a relationship with you. So as you say, maybe it's a yes in terms of communication, but not a yes in relation to the question about timing so it makes it hard to know what the actual message is here. And yeah, in terms of more precise questions, the above cards were pulled in response to, "Am I going to hear from ....today?" or "what can I expect in terms of communication from....today". And nothing happened. So I must be missing something.

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RosieBlack
41 minutes ago, gregory said:

 

Picking this bit in particular. You CANNOT assume that the cards are "wrong " because 

 

 

You want to believe that, but it ain't necessarily so. I don't read for myself because I KNOW I am prone to thinking like this. But - well, let's say  the cards tell me that the friend I am meeting tomorrow has been lying to me about something - I KNOW her; I KNOW she wouldn't. So I might try and see the reading differently.

 

But I cannot know that. She might be. No-one completely knows someone else. The fact that I find it hard to accept that warning does not mean I'm right and the cards are wrong. It means - be careful. (In my case it would actually mean ask someone else to read for me....!)

 

Hey gregory, thanks for your comment. I explained above in response to Katrinka why that meaning of trickery doesn't fit with my situation. The person in question and I don't have a relationship at present, nor are we in regular communication but we are on good terms. So it doesn't make sense in that context and hiding feelings is the only part I could find that might fit. But if we were in a relationship and it said he was lying about something I would certainly take heed of that and try to get to the bottom of it.

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You are still missing the point. It might not fit in your mind - but that cannot mean it is for sure wrong. When I was in my late 30s I discovered that my father had lied to me all my life about something rather huge. I had no idea, and if a reader had told me he was hiding something. I would have said they were incompetent.

 

How can you PROVE it is only about concealing his feelings ? You can't. You have no idea what else he might want to hide.

 

Whatever you "know" about someone else can never be the whole truth. But good luck.

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RosieBlack
53 minutes ago, gregory said:

You are still missing the point. It might not fit in your mind - but that cannot mean it is for sure wrong. When I was in my late 30s I discovered that my father had lied to me all my life about something rather huge. I had no idea, and if a reader had told me he was hiding something. I would have said they were incompetent.

 

How can you PROVE it is only about concealing his feelings ? You can't. You have no idea what else he might want to hide.

 

Whatever you "know" about someone else can never be the whole truth. But good luck.

 

I honestly do get what you're saying. But the thing is that if someone is not part of my life and I ask how they are feeling about me, how does trickery or deception make sense on any level? I didn't ask about the past or future, just what his current feelings are. What I said seems to be the only thing that fits in this context. So I'm not saying that just because something doesn't fit in my mind then it's wrong, it just doesn't fit in this context. If it was about someone I actually have a relationship with then I would agree, but he's not in my life. He's not telling me anything, so basically there is nothing he could be lying about since there isn't anything he is saying, you know what I mean? You can't be lying to someone about things when you don't even talk to them. So the way it appears to me is that either that card means he's hiding his feelings or pushing them away or I've done something wrong with pulling it and it shouldn't have come out. Because honestly, right now the only reason he would have to talk to me would be to tell me he has feelings for me and wants me back. There's no other reason to be in contact with me so that's really the only thing I can think he'd have any need to hide or lie about because right now nothing else is relevant. If there's any other deception going on it has no affect on me whatsoever because he's not in my life. 

 

This also adds more confusion to the situation though. I'm getting advice that I should look back on my day and see what things the cards could apply to, where they fit and resonate with me because I'm not seeing where they do generally. I'm basically being told to apply them to whatever might fit, even on a small scale. But when I do that about something I might be biased on, I'm told that I'm doing it wrong or putting my own interpretation to it or seeing what I want to see. The messages are very mixed and it's not making anything easier for me. If I can't apply the card in a way that resonates that means I'm not interpreting correctly and if I do apply the cards in a way that resonates then I'm also doing it incorrectly. I can't seem to win. 

Edited by RosieBlack
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Please don't think of any of this as winning or losing. That's not what it's all about. Reading takes practice; reading for yourself and managing to keep your own feelings and knowledge out of it, even more so. There are killer situations I could cite. A friend asks you to read on whether now is a good time to plan a baby; you saw her husband in an intimate position with his secretary at the weekend; it's clear she doesn't know. The reading looks as if a baby is a good possibility and there are no cards suggesting an affair. What do you say to her ?

 

It's hard. That's why people suggest reading for TV shows or books. That way you are totally not invested in the outcome and can be dispassionate. It's also why reading a single card (I would run with a single card, myself)  at the end of the day is good - you can look for anything in the card that fits how the day went - and THAT - being already known, will point you to what aspects of each card is relevant to what actually happened. You can't NOT interpret that right - you know what the day was like. So - you have 10 swords and you had a GREAT day. Do look to what you may have expected to be awful didn't happen; what bad aspect of some situation ended - that kind of thing. You can't really see what you want to see about a day that has passed already.

 

Most of all, I think you are overthinking and driving yourself nuts here !

 

1 hour ago, RosieBlack said:

But the thing is that if someone is not part of my life and I ask how they are feeling about me, how does trickery or deception make sense on any level? I didn't ask about the past or future, just what his current feelings are.

 

WELL - it could be that he is feeling guilty about you, about not having told you about when he went bankrupt, or his six children by four other women. Obviously I made that up - but you see what I mean ? 

 

But most of all - stop worrying so much. It is always possible that a reading was actually wrong, after all - and reading about someone else's feelings is a killer for me - I don't do it. I need the person I am reading about to be involved with the reading, and I guess he didn't ask you to read ?

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1 hour ago, RosieBlack said:

This also adds more confusion to the situation though. I'm getting advice that I should look back on my day and see what things the cards could apply to, where they fit and resonate with me because I'm not seeing where they do generally.

That is one thing that I mentioned earlier on in the thread when talking about a card of the day:

On 9/10/2021 at 12:16 PM, Rupicapra said:

For the card of the day to be honest I find it easier to actually draw a card at the end of the day and then reflect: what happened during my day that could connect to the card?

let me add to clarify: for my personal practise and learning of the meaning of individual cards, as there is often quite a wide range of possible meanings, I draw my "card of the day" at the end of the day. Then with my own knowledge of the card meanings I try to remember situation that happened during the day and that are reflected in the card. Additionally, I sometimes check into a book or my favourite websites for meanings if there is anything that I did not think about. 

It is also exercise for me to learn the scope of possible meanings for a card and connect with the cards and the imagery. Because you were talking in your post about card of the day and (not) connecting. And you were so fixed on that ONE meaning of the card, the 2 of Cups, that you would make a romantic connection on that day. My point of the post was that there is a wider range of meanings and rather than using the card of the day to predict what will happen to me (I don't read that way anyway, it's too passive for me personally), I use it to reflect and to learn about the meanings of the cards. 

 

Main thing is to find your own way of readings, and there are many ways. Take it easy, it is a long learning process too and doesn't happen overnight. And don't compare your reading style and outcome to the professional reader that you have been visiting either please. Make it your own journey and enjoy it.

 

 

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RosieBlack
23 minutes ago, gregory said:

Please don't think of any of this as winning or losing. That's not what it's all about. Reading takes practice; reading for yourself and managing to keep your own feelings and knowledge out of it, even more so. There are killer situations I could cite. A friend asks you to read on whether now is a good time to plan a baby; you saw her husband in an intimate position with his secretary at the weekend; it's clear she doesn't know. The reading looks as if a baby is a good possibility and there are no cards suggesting an affair. What do you say to her ?

 

It's hard. That's why people suggest reading for TV shows or books. That way you are totally not invested in the outcome and can be dispassionate. It's also why reading a single card (I would run with a single card, myself)  at the end of the day is good - you can look for anything in the card that fits how the day went - and THAT - being already known, will point you to what aspects of each card is relevant to what actually happened. You can't NOT interpret that right - you know what the day was like. So - you have 10 swords and you had a GREAT day. Do look to what you may have expected to be awful didn't happen; what bad aspect of some situation ended - that kind of thing. You can't really see what you want to see about a day that has passed already.

 

Most of all, I think you are overthinking and driving yourself nuts here !

 

 

WELL - it could be that he is feeling guilty about you, about not having told you about when he went bankrupt, or his six children by four other women. Obviously I made that up - but you see what I mean ? 

 

But most of all - stop worrying so much. It is always possible that a reading was actually wrong, after all - and reading about someone else's feelings is a killer for me - I don't do it. I need the person I am reading about to be involved with the reading, and I guess he didn't ask you to read ?

 

Well, in that situation you first described, screw the reading! I'm telling my friend her husband is cheating on her so don't have a baby with the scumbag! 😄 I guess in a situation like that if it was applied to my own life, I would also have to keep a rational mind. Like the cards might tell me I could be with someone if I want to, but then I need to ask myself if that's what's best for me which I think I am getting better at!

 

That's very true about doing a card at the end of the day. I've had different suggestions in relation to this so I've never known the right approach. Some say do at the beginning of the day, others say the day before, but I guess what you said makes sense. I have noticed that when I do it before I have these expectations and then I'm disappointed, But I've also read others saying that if you ask the cards a question you already know the answer to then they get annoyed at you and give you conflicting answers or something?? I don't know, it's all very confusing!

 

What you said about him feeling guilty about lying to me, now that could definitely be true. I don't know what he might have lied about but I would not in the least be surprised if he did lie. I didn't think of it that way, so that is an interesting perspective to have on it. I know he certainly feels guilt about something as he did email me recently apologising.

 

Well no he didn't ask me to read I think that much is obvious 😄. Why does it matter if they're involved or not? The readings I've had done have told me he has feelings for me and wants me back etc but I've also been told that the energies can change at any time so I've felt the need to keep having readings done to make sure he still likes me and is going to do something to win me back. I figured if I could learn to read for myself then I wouldn't need to keep paying to get readings done to check on it. I think I explained above why I'm doing it and about anxiety etc. May not be the healthiest thing, but I've been finding moving on and not talking to him SO hard that if the cards tell me he's still interested and is going to come back when he's ready then it eases my mind. But of course, as I say, I don't want to hang on if that changes so I feel like I have to keep checking. I did a few readings on how a friend of mine was feeling in general (without his knowledge) and then afterwards asked how he was feeling and told him I'd done a reading and what cards I'd pulled and he said they were pretty accurate. So I'm unsure how someone's involvement in the reading affects it but at least on those occasions I got pretty accurate answers.

 

 

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RosieBlack
24 minutes ago, Rupicapra said:

That is one thing that I mentioned earlier on in the thread when talking about a card of the day:

let me add to clarify: for my personal practise and learning of the meaning of individual cards, as there is often quite a wide range of possible meanings, I draw my "card of the day" at the end of the day. Then with my own knowledge of the card meanings I try to remember situation that happened during the day and that are reflected in the card. Additionally, I sometimes check into a book or my favourite websites for meanings if there is anything that I did not think about. 

It is also exercise for me to learn the scope of possible meanings for a card and connect with the cards and the imagery. Because you were talking in your post about card of the day and (not) connecting. And you were so fixed on that ONE meaning of the card, the 2 of Cups, that you would make a romantic connection on that day. My point of the post was that there is a wider range of meanings and rather than using the card of the day to predict what will happen to me (I don't read that way anyway, it's too passive for me personally), I use it to reflect and to learn about the meanings of the cards. 

 

Main thing is to find your own way of readings, and there are many ways. Take it easy, it is a long learning process too and doesn't happen overnight. And don't compare your reading style and outcome to the professional reader that you have been visiting either please. Make it your own journey and enjoy it.

 

 

 

Thanks, yes that's what gregory said above - I've just been given a lot of different advice so never know what to do. But I'll give this a go. 

 

You said about being fixated on one meaning of the 2 of cups, but the emphasis in this card seems to be on the romantic partnership side of it. But anyway, it could have applied to the bond I have with my cat for all I know. 

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5 hours ago, RosieBlack said:

The next part of what you said I'll answer as best I can. I do have mental health difficulties and like to use tarot as a form of therapy giving me guidance and help on the best paths to take for me etc. And usually you'd have therapy once a week, sometimes every day depending on the type, and there are certain areas of my life I struggle with the most. I'm also obviously very fascinated by tarot and the unknown and I don't have many other hobbies so I'm investing a lot of time in this one right now. So yes, I was having bi-weekly tarot readings on a subject that was giving me a lot of anxiety (still is), but also wanted to be able to read for myself if I could so I could have them less frequently. I saw that it's advised to have readings done to help in your learning and also maybe check the discrepancies in my readings and those with the same answers. I feel readings done for me would likely be more accurate than my own, but if I see they are similar it will give me more confidence in mine. But with regards to cards like the Emperor and you saying about me projecting, I can totally see what you're saying, but in this case if the question relates specifically to someone's feelings for you surely you have to somehow try to apply that card in terms of feelings...? You have to find something in it that might relate to feelings, otherwise it seems a pretty useless card, no? And essentially you can just discard it which then makes me think it was an error of some sort. I haven't seen any definitions of that card that suggest focusing on finances which is why I didn't understand her interpretation, but a for my own I have just been trying to apply it to feelings as best I can. The only thing I've really read that has given me some insight is that the emperor uses logic over emotion, which suggests to me that he might be trying not to acknowledge his feelings. I know this is not a feeling card, but then many of the cards aren't. Still, they can be applied to many areas and types of questions. Otherwise I'd have to specifically only use cups as an indication of feelings, right? If I pull a pentacles card (which generally applies to finances), I either have to apply in in terms of feelings or say, "No this person has not feelings and they're focusing on money". So what is the right way to do it? The overall message of that question wasn't a positive one, but then the next question on what he thinks about a future with me were very positive and the reader said that too. So it's a bit of a confusing one.

 

I can definitely see how being emotionally invested can muddy the interpretation, but I do honestly try to remain impartial. I only look for definitions that seem to fit the other cards or that makes sense to me based on what I know about the other person. So if I get a spread with mostly positive cards and a couple of negatives, I have to take that there's an underlying positive tone, right? For example someone's feelings comes up in a spread as Death, 8 of wands, the sun, the magician and 5 of swords I can see that death and 5 of swords can be negatives. But looking at how they're grouped together their messages don't seem to be on overall negative one. I've got death and 8 of wands together and while death can mean he has no feelings for me, being grouped with the 8 of wands suggests to me that he's actually burying his feelings but actually has strong feelings for me. Both cards are also about change/transformation which could point to growth. The sun and magician together are also really positive and seem to suggest he knows on some level that we would be happy together and the final card on its own points to an inner conflict of some sort or feeling defeated or sad by what happened between us in the past so unsure whether or not to push forward. That last card points to conflict, but we are not really in communication and are on good terms so it can't apply to actual conflict or tension between us. And I know that the death card can't mean he has no feelings for me because 1. He's pretty much admitted he still does and 2. it doesn't fit with the other cards.

 

 

This right here is what I meant by projecting your own feelings into the cards. In regard to the multiple examples you've given, you always seem to assume that he has feelings for you (and is just hiding them, or the reader is wrong, or the cards don't make sense). If he's told you he has feelings for you, either you believe him or you don't, but you don't need to double and triple check with your cards. If he hasn't said anything, there's always the possibility that he doesn't have feelings for you or that they're negative ones. You don't know.

 

Secondly, the Tarot is not a substitute for therapy! It can be used as a self-reflection tool to become more aware of yourself and grow as a person, but asking about someone else's feelings isn't that. In fact, it sounds like asking about his feelings is only being unhelpful, because you're becoming stuck in overthinking it. Stop asking about that or at least take a break from it. Reading about something else. I'm sure there are other things you care about that are NOT this guy -- ask about that. Offer to do some practice readings for your friends, do some spreads about personality, heck, ask about the weather if you want.

 

Also, remember that people have free will. This guy is not a machine, he's a human being, and human beings can make choices. Even if you did a reading and it indicated that your future together could be perfect, that's no guarantee that he'd choose that.

 

Finally, I know not everyone thinks the same things about Tarot and privacy, but I personally think that reading about the feelings of someone you like is dicey. Feelings are a very private thing that people share when (or if) they're comfortable. If he doesn't have feelings for you or if he just doesn't want to share it, maybe that's something you should respect, and focus more on your own feelings or something for a while.

 

I agree with what other people have said -- you're overthinking this. Maybe it would be good to take a step back and do something else with your cards. Maybe even take a break from the Tarot to clear your head and gain some distance.

 

Hope this helps.

 

 

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24 minutes ago, RosieBlack said:

But anyway, it could have applied to the bond I have with my cat for all I know. 

Yes!

I don't use the Wild Unknown, but have you seen Carrie Mallon's blog about the interpretations she uses for this deck? She mentions exactly that, cuddling your pet. A meaningful connection. It does not need to be limited to romance. 

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RosieBlack
53 minutes ago, dust said:

 

 

This right here is what I meant by projecting your own feelings into the cards. In regard to the multiple examples you've given, you always seem to assume that he has feelings for you (and is just hiding them, or the reader is wrong, or the cards don't make sense). If he's told you he has feelings for you, either you believe him or you don't, but you don't need to double and triple check with your cards. If he hasn't said anything, there's always the possibility that he doesn't have feelings for you or that they're negative ones. You don't know.

 

Secondly, the Tarot is not a substitute for therapy! It can be used as a self-reflection tool to become more aware of yourself and grow as a person, but asking about someone else's feelings isn't that. In fact, it sounds like asking about his feelings is only being unhelpful, because you're becoming stuck in overthinking it. Stop asking about that or at least take a break from it. Reading about something else. I'm sure there are other things you care about that are NOT this guy -- ask about that. Offer to do some practice readings for your friends, do some spreads about personality, heck, ask about the weather if you want.

 

Also, remember that people have free will. This guy is not a machine, he's a human being, and human beings can make choices. Even if you did a reading and it indicated that your future together could be perfect, that's no guarantee that he'd choose that.

 

Finally, I know not everyone thinks the same things about Tarot and privacy, but I personally think that reading about the feelings of someone you like is dicey. Feelings are a very private thing that people share when (or if) they're comfortable. If he doesn't have feelings for you or if he just doesn't want to share it, maybe that's something you should respect, and focus more on your own feelings or something for a while.

 

I agree with what other people have said -- you're overthinking this. Maybe it would be good to take a step back and do something else with your cards. Maybe even take a break from the Tarot to clear your head and gain some distance.

 

Hope this helps.

 

 

 

Well I'm trying not to assume anything really. But if I ask a question about someone's feeling and the card I get doesn't give any indication of that then I don't know what to believe. I just assume that if the other cards make a suggestion of feelings being there then the other should just add another layer. But clearly I'm too inexperienced. Yeah, look I know he has indicated he still has feelings for me, I've just been trying to figure out how deep they are and if it's worth waiting around for. And of course there could be negative feelings, I just rarely get actual negative cards in that respect. 

 

Perhaps you're right about overthinking it. This thread really only started being about my daily readings being inaccurate and not anything to do with him specifically and then it got onto him but really my main focus has been trying to assign relevant meaning to the cards that make sense. If I can't make sense of them or get a clear picture then there's not much point me doing it. I have done readings on other things and for a couple of other people, but of course my main issue hear is finding out if there is some inherent issue with my readings or if I'm somehow interpreting them wrongly. 

 

Fair enough re privacy, although I'd say that the cards aren't specific enough to be considered an invasion of someone's thoughts as such. A card might suggest someone wants to marry you and have kids with you and really they just might really like you and haven't even thought that far into the future. And maybe they're not even right. I generally don't take anything as 100% truth until I hear it from the horse's mouth. I appreciate everyone's view on this, but if you've ever been on the receiving end of someone giving you mixed signals and hurtful behaviour and reeling you in and pushing you away then you'll understand why having clarity matters and helps so much. Sometimes it just helps to understand why someone has behaved in this way that's caused you so much hurt. If someone tells me how they feel I know better how to deal with the situation or them. If they do something hurtful then I'll react badly because I'll think they're being selfish, but if I know it's just because they're confused and overwhelmed then I will act with compassion. So if that person won't tell me what they're feeling but I can get an idea from the cards it helps me to come to terms with things and forgive. And personally, I feel that when I'm open with my feelings with someone and they can't do the same that's disrespectful and unfair to me to leave me in limbo. So if what I'm doing is disrespectful then we're equals in that respect I'd say. I am also very well aware that there's no guarantee that this guy will decide to come back and I have to deal with that very real possibility, but it does help to know that he cares and hasn't just forgotten about me and that I matter to him. He sent me an email apology recently for his behaviour and part of me wanted to ignore him and believe he was just doing that in the hope I might come running back and that it wasn't sincere, but with the readings I now believe he was being sincere and really does regret what happened in the past. It may not make sense to you, but sometimes it can help just to know that the other person is also hurting as a result of their actions and that you're not alone in it. So it has been helpful in some respects. No therapist could explain to me why he did the things he did and help me understand them and that understanding has helped a great deal with me coming to terms with the situation. 

 

Anyway, I don't want to get into it any further. I didn't mean to push this thread in the direction of someone's feelings for me, I just kept using it for examples of interpretations etc and things not being accurate. But I can see it's pushing buttons and so I won't mention it anymore. I appreciate your thoughts and will take what you said on board and that's all I can really say for now.

Edited by RosieBlack
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It's not pushing buttons, people are just giving you their honest thoughts. You asked why your readings are inaccurate and people have been trying to point out to you that maybe they're not all about him or even about his feelings for you being good ones. Your expectations about the Tarot are all over the place so we've told you what we think and how you could become better at reading if that's what you actually want. Your feelings for this guy seem to be a major factor in why reading isn't working out for you and that's why we mentioned it. But you're right, this discussion is going in circles. There's nothing else we can tell you because we've already told you our opinions and offered advice.

 

Quote

And personally, I feel that when I'm open with my feelings with someone and they can't do the same that's disrespectful and unfair to me to leave me in limbo. So if what I'm doing is disrespectful then we're equals in that respect I'd say.

 

Honestly... I think your relationship stuff is something you need to work out without the Tarot. This does not sound like a good relationship and the Tarot can't fix that for you.

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RosieBlack
5 minutes ago, dust said:

It's not pushing buttons, people are just giving you their honest thoughts. You asked why your readings are inaccurate and people have been trying to point out to you that maybe they're not all about him or even about his feelings for you being good ones. Your expectations about the Tarot are all over the place so we've told you what we think and how you could become better at reading if that's what you actually want. Your feelings for this guy seem to be a major factor in why reading isn't working out for you and that's why we mentioned it. But you're right, this discussion is going in circles. There's nothing else we can tell you because we've already told you our opinions and offered advice.

 

 

Honestly... I think your relationship stuff is something you need to work out without the Tarot. This does not sound like a good relationship and the Tarot can't fix that for you.

 

Ok, I wasn't aware my feelings were affecting my readings but that's why I'm here to ask and find out. 

 

Yes I can appreciate that you may not think the situation sounds like a good one, but just because something wasn't healthy in the past it doesn't mean it can't be worked on in a healthy way in the future. I think wanting to understand things that happened in the past and get closure on them is natural and if I can't get that from the person themselves then it's nice to be able to get that closure elsewhere. It's better than hounding the other person to explain why they did this or that and making it even worse. I want to move past that and the tarot has helped me with that. I can understand not everyone will get that and I'm not arguing that the relationship was a healthy one - it certainly wasn't - but isn't that how people learn? From past mistakes? That's how he grow and become better people. And I just happen to want to start again with someone I had a lot of feelings for and have a lot of good memories with too, start from a good and healthy place. And I'm just saying that we both deserve to know where the other person stands. For once it would be nice to just have a way of knowing where I stand with someone or understanding their actions. I don't think I'm alone in this or looking for answers via the supernatural. I don't expect it to be able to fix all my issues but it's certainly a good starting point for me. I don't expect anyone to agree on my methods, I'm just doing my best really to get by with the tools I have and there is no bad intent in any of it. But again, this isn't the place for this, I don't want to have to try defend myself or anything as you don't really know me as a person so I'd hope that if you did know me you'd understand my perspective more. I do appreciate all the advice and help and I will keep working on myself as I have been doing and I'm sure I'll get there in the end.

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6 hours ago, RosieBlack said:

I don't give me cards meanings in their positions, I just lay them out and try to tell a full story. Is that wrong? 

 

Not at all. I almost always read like that, too. But you weren't the one doing the reading. If she used named positions, they need to be taken into account.
 

6 hours ago, RosieBlack said:

So for example if I'm not with this person but we both like each other but aren't even in regular contact, how can he be tricking me or deceiving me? Do you see what I mean? This is why the only way to apply this card seems to be that he's hiding his feelings ergo the silence. If he didn't like me at all or want anything to do with me the 7 of swords wouldn't seem to apply at all because someone can't deceive you if they're not even in your life anymore. 

 

Are you in contact at all? And if not, what has he told you in the past? How do you know all of it is true and good? You don't.
 

6 hours ago, RosieBlack said:

I thought that as well about the 3 of cups card but then I asked about it in expectation for communication that day and alongside it was the page of swords and I heard nothing. The next day it was 3 of cups and the star - also both positive cards. Some websites even suggest the star means someone from your past may come back to rekindle a relationship with you.

 

A lot of people who create websites have no clue what they're talking about. That sounds more like a 6 of Cups interpretation.
The Star is basically hope. Hope is often in vain.
 

6 hours ago, RosieBlack said:

So as you say, maybe it's a yes in terms of communication, but not a yes in relation to the question about timing so it makes it hard to know what the actual message is here. And yeah, in terms of more precise questions, the above cards were pulled in response to, "Am I going to hear from ....today?" or "what can I expect in terms of communication from....today". And nothing happened. So I must be missing something.


The cards need more time to play out than "before I go to bed tonight." Dailies sometimes manifest the next day. 
And I'd really, really find a more reputable source for meanings and stick with it, not collect stuff from all over the internet. 

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4 hours ago, RosieBlack said:

I honestly do get what you're saying. But the thing is that if someone is not part of my life and I ask how they are feeling about me, how does trickery or deception make sense on any level? I didn't ask about the past or future, just what his current feelings are. What I said seems to be the only thing that fits in this context. So I'm not saying that just because something doesn't fit in my mind then it's wrong, it just doesn't fit in this context. If it was about someone I actually have a relationship with then I would agree, but he's not in my life. He's not telling me anything, so basically there is nothing he could be lying about since there isn't anything he is saying, you know what I mean? You can't be lying to someone about things when you don't even talk to them. So the way it appears to me is that either that card means he's hiding his feelings or pushing them away or I've done something wrong with pulling it and it shouldn't have come out. Because honestly, right now the only reason he would have to talk to me would be to tell me he has feelings for me and wants me back. There's no other reason to be in contact with me so that's really the only thing I can think he'd have any need to hide or lie about because right now nothing else is relevant. If there's any other deception going on it has no affect on me whatsoever because he's not in my life. 


He's got you on a string. You're pulling cards on him and putting all this effort into speculating about his feelings for you, but he's living his life and not thinking about you. He knows he can get you to come running if he gets bored or needs favors from you. 

That's manipulative, and deceitful. He's letting you believe in a potential that isn't there. 

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RosieBlack
28 minutes ago, katrinka said:

 

Not at all. I almost always read like that, too. But you weren't the one doing the reading. If she used named positions, they need to be taken into account.
 

 

Are you in contact at all? And if not, what has he told you in the past? How do you know all of it is true and good? You don't.
 

 

A lot of people who create websites have no clue what they're talking about. That sounds more like a 6 of Cups interpretation.
The Star is basically hope. Hope is often in vain.
 


The cards need more time to play out than "before I go to bed tonight." Dailies sometimes manifest the next day. 
And I'd really, really find a more reputable source for meanings and stick with it, not collect stuff from all over the internet. 

 

Yes that's true about positioning...I didn't ask and she didn't tell me so I guess maybe I wasn't aware of that.

 

No we're not really in contact at all. Apart from an email I got from him recently saying he was sorry for what happened the last time we spoke and hopes I'm doing better. He also said he still thinks about me but that all that matters is that I'm ok. In the past he only ever said good things, he really seemed to think the world of me. Of course, I don't know if it was true for sure. Never any knowing if someone is doing something for selfish gains or because they mean it. Seemed sincere to me though. I'm totally aware that he could have lied or had bad thoughts in the past, the card just didn't seem relevant to current thoughts. But gregory did put it in a way that made a bit more sense about maybe feeling guilty for past deception. Do you agree on that? It doesn't matter too much I suppose, but it is nice to have a clear picture and get a message that seems clear from the cards.

 

I have asked questions about hearing from someone a few days in advance and still nothing happened so those kinds of questions just don't seem to work for me or at least I don't know how to interpret them. I don't know which sites are reputable sources and which aren't to be honest but I'm all ears!

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24 minutes ago, RosieBlack said:

 

Ok, I wasn't aware my feelings were affecting my readings but that's why I'm here to ask and find out. 

 

Yes I can appreciate that you may not think the situation sounds like a good one, but just because something wasn't healthy in the past it doesn't mean it can't be worked on in a healthy way in the future.

 

That's the kind of thing I might expect someone to do with an actual marriage, or at least a couple who have been heavily committed for many years, and only in certain cases. If there are kids involved, if he's not abusive, if a divorce would just drain resources, etc. Not a casual thing like what you've been describing. These things are a lot of work, and they're hard. Additionally, both parties have to be willing to do the work. It doesn't sound like that's the case here.
 

2 hours ago, RosieBlack said:

The readings I've had done have told me he has feelings for me and wants me back etc but I've also been told that the energies can change at any time so I've felt the need to keep having readings done to make sure he still likes me and is going to do something to win me back.

 

I've noticed that when the cards give a client an answer they like in these situations, they are quick to call again. It would be very easy to take advantage of that by always telling them what they want to hear rather than what the cards are actually saying. I could probably keep them calling and drain their entire bank account. I've lost customers by not doing that, but there are readers out there who do, unfortunately. For some, the almighty dollar outweighs being able to look at themselves in the mirror. Readers need to be chosen carefully.

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RosieBlack
23 minutes ago, katrinka said:


He's got you on a string. You're pulling cards on him and putting all this effort into speculating about his feelings for you, but he's living his life and not thinking about you. He knows he can get you to come running if he gets bored or needs favors from you. 

That's manipulative, and deceitful. He's letting you believe in a potential that isn't there. 

 

You might be right, or he might think that, but he doesn't have me on a string. I know I'm telling you guys here that I have feelings for him and want him back but he doesn't know that. I don't want to bore you with all the details but I ended it and blocked him, didn't talk for a month and then he emailed me apologising. That's where we are now. He's got no reason to think he can click his fingers and I'll come running, but I do agree that's how it was in the past. I have changed though and gotten a clearer perspective and whilst I still have feelings for him I'm not letting my heart rule me. I will not be going back there unless I know things will be different this time around and he proves it to me first. BUT, he hasn't even asked me for anything so that might be a moot point anyway. However, letting me believe in a potential wouldn't be entirely accurate as I know very well he isn't ready for something serious, there's just a part of me that hopes he will change his mind at some point if he likes me enough and he said many times how much he liked me. Again though, I will admit that this is what happened in the past though. He did lead me to believe he wanted something more serious and then went all weird and withdrew and really hurt me. That's why I walked away. So maybe that card is picking up on what happened in the past as you're pretty spot on in that context. 

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RosieBlack
3 minutes ago, katrinka said:

 

That's the kind of thing I might expect someone to do with an actual marriage, or at least a couple who have been heavily committed for many years, and only in certain cases. If there are kids involved, if he's not abusive, if a divorce would just drain resources, etc. Not a casual thing like what you've been describing. These things are a lot of work, and they're hard. Additionally, both parties have to be willing to do the work. It doesn't sound like that's the case here.
 

 

I've noticed that when the cards give a client an answer they like in these situations, they are quick to call again. It would be very easy to take advantage of that by always telling them what they want to hear rather than what the cards are actually saying. I could probably keep them calling and drain their entire bank account. I've lost customers by not doing that, but there are readers out there who do, unfortunately. For some, the almighty dollar outweighs being able to look at themselves in the mirror. Readers need to be chosen carefully.

 

Yeah I know you're completely right about a casual thing, but it was very complicated. Very. And very intense too. And yes both parties have to agree to do the work. I felt a strong connection and I am pretty sure he did too so I feel like it could be something good if we start over on the right foot. It was a very unusual situation, but again, I don't want to bore you with all the details. 

 

Hmmm, you could have a point about giving readings a person likes. But I'll be honest, this lady almost tries to discourage me from having them sometimes, telling me to just trust in the universe that it has a plan for me. So I'd be averse to thinking she's just telling me what I want to hear. And sometimes her messages aren't what I want to hear...she has told me before that yes this guy likes me very much and sees me as someone he could commit to but that he will be VERY slow about it and has a lot to sort out and etc etc but he will get there. So that's not like jump for joy kind of news you know? It could be a very long time until something happens and I think if all she was after was the money she'd have given me much more encouraging answers. Also, unless she is purposely choosing the cards, she does mostly seem to be pulling cards that match the interpretations she's giving. Occasionally she only pulls one card in response to a question though so I don't know for sure. I have found her to be very thorough end empathetic though. I'd hate to think she wasn't being genuine.

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5 minutes ago, RosieBlack said:

But gregory did put it in a way that made a bit more sense about maybe feeling guilty for past deception. Do you agree on that? 

 

It's possible. gregory is a good reader, she gets a lot of hits. We have completely different styles, but I've seen enough that I respect her.

The combined experience of the people giving you answers in this thread is probably 100+ years. You're getting good information here.
 

5 minutes ago, RosieBlack said:

I have asked questions about hearing from someone a few days in advance and still nothing happened so those kinds of questions just don't seem to work for me or at least I don't know how to interpret them. I don't know which sites are reputable sources and which aren't to be honest but I'm all ears!


I like source materials - the Pictorial Key to the Tarot is vital for RWS type decks.

https://www.sacred-texts.com/tarot/pkt/index.htm

Good Thoth material is also relevant since both are Golden Dawn based. This is a wonderful old site with clear, simple explanations:
https://www.corax.com/tarot/cards/index.html

There are some great blogs out there, too.

Just make an effort to avoid junk sites. You'll learn to spot them: new age style pages with purple and pretty rocks, claims that Tarot can be learned quickly and easily, certification programs, offers of free courses so they can get your email and spam you with ads. Just close the tab and move on.

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RosieBlack
4 minutes ago, katrinka said:

 

It's possible. gregory is a good reader, she gets a lot of hits. We have completely different styles, but I've seen enough that I respect her.

The combined experience of the people giving you answers in this thread is probably 100+ years. You're getting good information here.
 


I like source materials - the Pictorial Key to the Tarot is vital for RWS type decks.

https://www.sacred-texts.com/tarot/pkt/index.htm

Good Thoth material is also relevant since both are Golden Dawn based. This is a wonderful old site with clear, simple explanations:
https://www.corax.com/tarot/cards/index.html

There are some great blogs out there, too.

Just make an effort to avoid junk sites. You'll learn to spot them: new age style pages with purple and pretty rocks, claims that Tarot can be learned quickly and easily, certification programs, offers of free courses so they can get your email and spam you with ads. Just close the tab and move on.

 

Although you both seemed to say about lying/sneaky behaviour even though gregory mentioned it in past tense and you in present tense. You still both picked up on it though in your interpretations! And thank you, I truly appreciate your time.

 

Thank you so much for those links. I'll put them in my book marks! The main sites that usually come up first are biddy tarot, labrythnos and the tarot guide...what are your thoughts on them? Also divernism.com

 

Also, just to touch on what I said earlier when you said about working on something sounding weird when it's something casual and I don't think I explained that bit well. I didn't mean going back and working on issues within the relationship like you would in a marriage or committed relationship, I meant starting again from a point of pursuing something more serious. The issues were arising out of the fact that the situation was so confusing and that whilst we were trying to or pretending to be casual we were developing a connection and that was complicating things. It was feeling an awful lot like a relationship at times which just added even more confusion. There was actually nothing casual about it when I look back at it, apart from both of us saying it was. So if you just started afresh being on the same page and both being open and honest about your feelings then there'd be a better chance of it working out. That's what I think anyway 🙂

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16 minutes ago, RosieBlack said:

And sometimes her messages aren't what I want to hear...she has told me before that yes this guy likes me very much and sees me as someone he could commit to but that he will be VERY slow about it and has a lot to sort out and etc etc but he will get there. So that's not like jump for joy kind of news you know?

 

She could still be hedging her bets. If she told you he's crazy about you and he's coming back next week, but he didn't, you'd stop going to her. This way she's giving herself some wiggle room. 
I'm not saying she's definitely doing that - I don't know her, she could be an impeccably ethical person. It's just something to consider.
 

All in all, it just sound to me like you might need a new guy. A better one.
Someone to make you forget this other one or maybe want to throw rocks at him. 😁 
Life is short. Don't waste years of yours pining over this guy.

It reminds me of an old book I read once, Forever Amber. It takes place in the 1600s, during the Restoration in London. Amber meets a King's Cavalier named Bruce Carlton and runs away with him. He keeps her around for awhile and leaves. Amber ends up in debtor's prison. She claws her way up and out, she's a survivor. Again and again, she starts a new life and Bruce returns, they get together and wreck whatever marriage or situation she's built for herself. Then he leaves again. At one point, near the end, he marries someone else. She makes a final play for him (they have kids together, too.) He responds with "Any man would want you for his whore, but no man would want you for his wife." I literally saw red the first time I read that. She'd nursed him through plague and ended up getting plague herself prior to that. The book ends with her leaving her position as a mistress to King Charles II (!) and going to the colonies in America to continue chasing him.

Don't be Amber.

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RosieBlack
9 minutes ago, katrinka said:

 

She could still be hedging her bets. If she told you he's crazy about you and he's coming back next week, but he didn't, you'd stop going to her. This way she's giving herself some wiggle room. 
I'm not saying she's definitely doing that - I don't know her, she could be an impeccably ethical person. It's just something to consider.
 

All in all, it just sound to me like you might need a new guy. A better one.
Someone to make you forget this other one or maybe want to throw rocks at him. 😁 
Life is short. Don't waste years of yours pining over this guy.

It reminds me of an old book I read once, Forever Amber. It takes place in the 1600s, during the Restoration in London. Amber meets a King's Cavalier named Bruce Carlton and runs away with him. He keeps her around for awhile and leaves. Amber ends up in debtor's prison. She claws her way up and out, she's a survivor. Again and again, she starts a new life and Bruce returns, they get together and wreck whatever marriage or situation she's built for herself. Then he leaves again. At one point, near the end, he marries someone else. She makes a final play for him (they have kids together, too.) He responds with "Any man would want you for his whore, but no man would want you for his wife." I literally saw red the first time I read that. She'd nursed him through plague and ended up getting plague herself prior to that. The book ends with her leaving her position as a mistress to King Charles II (!) and going to the colonies in America to continue chasing him.

Don't be Amber.

 

Of course, I will consider it. When things haven't yet happened it can be hard to know who's telling you the truth and who isn't.

 

Yeah, you're probably right about me needing a new guy. It's going to sound silly but I've been told this is a divine pairing and we're meant to be together so I think that's a big part of why I'm holding on. Not only by this reader, but one before her too. My cards even told me the same thing 😬. Anyway, I've been reluctant to move on purely because I still have feelings and I don't want to be unfair to someone new, but it will probably take a good old while for these feelings to go. 

 

I definitely won't be Amber, don't worry!! 😄 Poor lady! I do know the signs to look out for now. It was DAMN hard to walk away the first time. If he did want me back and I saw any of those signs again I'd be out straight away. I'm sure you can imagine how difficult it is though when you've got people and cards telling you you're meant to be with this person though. Who would want to walk away from their soul mate that people are telling you you're going to marry and live happily ever after with....be nice to just know the truth or if I've been lied to and I'm kidding myself with my own readings. 😕

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11 minutes ago, RosieBlack said:

The main sites that usually come up first are biddy tarot, labrythnos and the tarot guide...what are your thoughts on them? Also divernism.com

 

Biddy is a CLASSIC example of the junk sites I mentioned. Nope, nope, and NOPE!
Labyrinthos appears to be built on the same model. These sites exist to sell you stuff, that's their main priority. There's no quality control.
The Tarot Guide - ack. More of the same.
Divinerism is Lisa Boswell's site. I know Lisa, and while I don't agree with her on everything, she's a good reader. Her site is also a bit of a hard sell (she's as much into marketing as reading), but it doesn't seem like that's the sole emphasis. There's some OK content there. I think it would be fine as a complement to studying source materials.

 

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5 hours ago, RosieBlack said:

Well no he didn't ask me to read I think that much is obvious 😄. Why does it matter if they're involved or not? 

 

In my view, if someone doesn't have any connection to a reading, the results you get don't tend to be very accurate. I also (my view, personal,. no-one has to agree) feel that reading on someone without their knowledge is dodgy - but that's just me and katrinka will now disagree. Because we do disagree a lot about that !

 

3 hours ago, katrinka said:

He's got you on a string. You're pulling cards on him and putting all this effort into speculating about his feelings for you, but he's living his life and not thinking about you. He knows he can get you to come running if he gets bored or needs favors from you. 

That's manipulative, and deceitful. He's letting you believe in a potential that isn't there. 

 

I hadn't thought of that...

2 hours ago, katrinka said:

It's possible. gregory is a good reader, she gets a lot of hits. We have completely different styles, but I've seen enough that I respect her.

I BEG your pardon ? :rofl:  (Sorry, Rosie, private joke, kinda !)

 

2 hours ago, katrinka said:

The combined experience of the people giving you answers in this thread is probably 100+ years. You're getting good information here.

 

That's a good point !

 

2 hours ago, katrinka said:

I like source materials - the Pictorial Key to the Tarot is vital for RWS type decks.

https://www.sacred-texts.com/tarot/pkt/index.htm

Good Thoth material is also relevant since both are Golden Dawn based. This is a wonderful old site with clear, simple explanations:
https://www.corax.com/tarot/cards/index.html

There are some great blogs out there, too.

Just make an effort to avoid junk sites. You'll learn to spot them: new age style pages with purple and pretty rocks, claims that Tarot can be learned quickly and easily, certification programs, offers of free courses so they can get your email and spam you with ads. Just close the tab and move on.

 

My absolutely favourite site for meanings is this:  (yes it is actually purple, but it's a solid site.)

 

https://www.aeclectic.net/tarot/learn/meanings/

 

Thirteen is a whiz. I wish she was here. I used to ask her stuff in the days of Aeclectic.

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